Friday, January 29, 2010

Little Turd


I don't like to offend ANYONE...But I am really ticked. I ate lunch with my daughter today at her school and sat there quietly listening to the conversation in the group in which we sat. Two girls, two boys, and me. The conversation started out as usual 3rd grade chatter about this or that. One of the boys wanted to be president and he shared who could serve with him. There was the border work (childish flirting) about who would marry who.

And then it turned ugly. The boys both pointed at the most popular girl in third grade and ridiculed her innocent actions from afar. ("Crap," I thought to myself, "My daughter is sitting with the geeks who can't do anything but make fun of popular people.")

Then the little boy I will affectionately call "TURD" said to me: "Mr. Hickam, Mr. Hickam (chuckle, chuckle) guess what (so and so) told (so and so...the girl sitting with my daughter)." Then he turns to the other boy and says, "Tell him, tell him about the bed."

Mayday, mayday, I think to myself and take a very keen interest in my daughters food.

The other boy is smart enough, or has boundary's enough to be embarrassed. But, of course, as turds do, his friend continued..."He was going to do it to her."

I was very obviously ignoring him at this point and he was no longer speaking to me. My daughter, who hardly said a word the whole time played oblivious to the entire exchange. I could have called attention to it by playing parent...but imagined the ridicule this would bring upon my daughter in the future. After all, these are the geeks apparently, who like to make fun of everything. So I just talked to little one about her day, and the weekend...and started composing what I will say to her about what she is facing in school.

I guess it is a gift that I was privy to this. I need to know what she is being sucked into due to the relationships she is forming, or are being formed around her.

I'm ticked though. I've always thought it sucks that we spend so much time tearing others down...but I've always understood that you don't talk to girls like that. You talk with your guy friends about that stuff all the time....but never in front of girls.

So who is the Little Turd's father? Does he know how badly he is failing....and how one man's failure ripples outward and impacts other innocents.

Crap. What can I possibly do but pull her out of the whole school. I can't tell her who she can and can't sit with...she will be forced by peer pressure to disobey and thus begin the process of hiding things from her parents because we burden her with impossible demands.

"Get away from my child you Turd!" Maybe I should have said something. Yeah, I think I should have said something...Crap. I guess I'm the Turd too.

God give me the words to speak so that she will hear the truth....(but I would also appreciate it if you could help her find some good people to be friends with).


  1. I feel your pain in wanting to protect your child from the "turds" that will, despite all your efforts, make their way into her life. As an older parent, I can only say that the wanting to protect will never go away, no matter my age or the age of my child. We just have to stay vigilant...

  2. Great news! GOOD still can win over EVIL! She had a "great day" at school today.

    You're doing a WONDERFUL job Daddy!


  3. Thanks Carol. Good to hear from you...I certainly am learning that parenting is a full time job...and will stay that way. (The pay is sure great though...most of the time.)

    Thanks hon. WE are both in the battle. tq

  4. I WANT TO KNOW WHO THIS "TURD'S PARETNS ARE"???? like yesterday! gosh I hate this! I hate this I hate this!
    calm down....auntie bobo.....

    R, you and Delma have done an amazing job raising DD, along with our almighty God! When we have HIM by our side, who can fail?

    I can say this, Dora is a wonderful child who comes from a God Loving family and we need many many kids like her. however, from my own experience, Peer Pressure can be a good thing ( thinking from the positive side, ha ha coming from auntie bobo, but hey its coming from within, it's there uncle R, I have it )
    If they continue to hang with great kids like Dora, we will pray that those BULLIES will want the attitude DD has and will change to be better and want to do right. PRAYER! yes the power of prayer!
    She's planting the seed Richard! The GREAT SEED...Dora is a smart kid. Lyza dealt with many of this, and she has turned out to be the best kid ever!!! Keep doing what yall are doing by loving, showing her, and with prayer!!! Love yall!
    ~ auntie Bobo